Kiss the Girl: Bachelorette Recap Week 5

By: Spencer Collins

 

The Bachelorette Recap: Week 5
“Kiss the Girl”
all the things you’re thinking while watching The Bachelorette, but don’t want to say

This week, the group moves to Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Our theme of yelling JoJo’s name from a balcony changes a little bit. This week the guys are just yelling it from the street.

Also, we’ve also known it, but it becomes very apparent in this picture that, everyone is about the same height, you know, except for Alex.

Wells gets the 1-on-1 date and it is brought to our attention that he is the only guy who hasn’t kissed her.

Let’s chat about this for a second normally if you’ve been dating someone for 5 weeks it would be odd to not kiss them. However, Wells has ALWAYS been on group dates. ALL the other guys have had one-on-one time with her. Plus, when you’re only spending 10 minutes here and there with a girl, is it really that weird to not have kissed them? I mean, in real life it isn’t. I get this is a reality show and things are different and sped up, but I also think it has to do with society.

When The Bachelor/ette franchise first started, they didn’t start kissing people till about halfway through. Listen, I’m not judging, because I’ve definitely kissed my fair share of frogs, but I just feel bad that Wells has so much pressure on him.

Anways, stepping off my soapbox now. They do finally kiss.

Afterwards, JoJo makes a cute, yet awkward comment saying, “That was the moment, Wells! We did it!”

During dinner, Wells tells JoJo his last relationship ended, because in the end, the two were just best friends and the romance died off. He also doesn’t believe in fairytale ends. He’s obviously going home.

However, JoJo picks up the rose even though she isn’t going to give it to him. I HATE THAT THE PRODUCERS MAKE THEM DO THIS! It’s so cruel.

Luke, Robby, Jordan, James, and Alex are all on this week’s group date.

They walk around town and somehow end up in a pick up soccer game. Surprisingly, these guys aren’t too bad. I know 2 of them are athletes and 2 of them were in the military, so they’re fit and athletic, but soccer is not one of those sports where people just look good at it if they don’t normally play it. Because he’s with all these athletic guys, James really starts to get self-conscious. However, he is the ONLY one who makes the penalty kick and gets to kiss JoJo.

I don’t care about the other guys, if he was really feeling that self-conscious, he should have really gone in for it. Not this little peck.

Luke shows us how it’s supposed to be done. We all saw the major make-out sesh between him and JoJo, but this look is the best part of that. TONS of passion.

Also, please note that ABC zoomed in on JoJo’s hand in Luke’s crotch.

James brings up concerns over Jordan, saying he’s “entitled.”

They are DUMB and it half sounds like James is just making things up, because he’s insecure. I’ve definitely gotten in arguments with friends when I know I’m right and they’re wrong. Plus, add in alcohol (because I’m sure the guys were drinking when they were playing cards) and arguments are just intensified.

JoJo brings this up with Jordan and he kinda just laughs about it. He defends himself, but doesn’t really reassure JoJo that he doesn’t think he’s better than everyone. He also makes faces that make me still not trust him.

For the first time EVER, there is a second 2-on 1 date.

This time, it’s with Chase and Derek and they are learning how to tango.

I feel the same way that Chad looks-OVER IT!

During their one-on-one time later in the night, Derek opens up and says he’s falling for her. At this point, I think he’s getting the rose and staying, especially since Chase is being more closed off. However, JoJo keeps pushing to get more from Chase, and when he finally opens up, I know he is the one staying.

Derek goes home sad and Chase goes back to being the Chase that I liked from a couple weeks ago.

During the cocktail party, Jordan brings JoJo to the roses to “just get it over with” and get himself a rose. This isn’t a funny joke when you’re trying to prove that you’re not entitled. However, they have a good chat where Jordan does open up a bit more and he’s back to being the really likeable Jordan.

Plus, JoJo is obviously crazy about him.

Please don’t let him break her heart.

JoJo can’t decide who to send home, so she keeps everyone. Still not sure what she sees in Alex, but I’m sure he’ll go home next week, sooooo I’m not too concerned.

Let me know what you thought about the episode and who your favorites are!